Let's talk body confidence

"You don't have to be like everyone else in order to feel confident, but if abs are your goal then hell yeah work your butt off to achieve it or if you are curvaceous then you post as many pictures as you want that capture those curves and own it!"

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How many of you stand in front of the mirror and are unhappy with the reflection staring back at you? How many of you have an image in your head of the "perfect body"? Is there something you wish you could change about your body? Boy's are you comfortable to take your top off on a hot summers day? When someone looks at you, do you presume they like what they see? I'd love for you to think long and hard about these questions and answer them honestly in your head.

The reason I'm asking you these questions is because like me, you may not even think about them, until you're made to. That's something I don't think a lot of us focus on because with social media and the internet we are so used to seeing another persons body, it's almost become normal. Fitness models will always post the best photo's of their physique showing off the parts they like, but the thing is, with social media it can make someone seem confident when they're not, they can choose to hide the parts they don't like easily.

Who in this world is going to post a photo on their social media directly showing the parts of their body they hate and are insecure about? Not many, because they'd be opening themselves up to critique and nasty comments. Body confidence has become something you don't hear people talking about, but you know what; nearly everyone in this world suffers in one way or another. There is always something someone doesn't like about themselves, whether that be thighs, tummy, abs or  even the skin on their face.

Trolls have become some sort of army, a constant worry and something everyone experiences at one part of their life. How many photo's do you see on Instagram that have numerous nasty comments below them? I'm talking about comments like "she's fat" "tags friend.. look at this lol" I'm sure you get the drift here. I see this so often that it no longer surprises me, even your favourite Insta Famous Influencer's get it, constant nasty comments that are there to try and put them down. It's something that has become hard to ignore for me, because it happens everywhere, it's expected and it's hard to escape, with people able to hide behind a screen it seems that they almost forget the people they're trolling are actual human beings and not just a photo, this can seriously effect people who are on the receiving end.

How would you feel to have people constantly trolling you? Really think about it, would it effect you? Bring you down? because I think most of us would say something along the lines of "It wouldn't effect me, I wouldn't take it to heart and I'd simply ignore those comments" but actually I think when you're actually put into that position, it would be much harder to ignore! (Of course it would) Trolling though, is a whole problem of it's own, it's just as important to me and maybe another time I'll really go into this, but today I purely want to focus on body confidence..

Body Image

This is how you portray yourself, your own body image and your feelings towards your own body. For example, you may hate one particular thing about your body, let's say your lips, but someone else may love them, this is caused by emotional attitudes, beliefs and perceptions, because you hate that thing you presume others will too. But this is often not the case, it's just simply because you feel less confident about that part and therefore you're automatically insecure about it.

At the end of the day, it all comes down to being confident in your own skin, loving your own body and not caring about others opinions. The reason I want to share this with you, is simply because I got thinking the other day; while stood in front of the mirror about the parts I hate about me. It made me realise I'm not the only one who suffers from this. We all know people who moan about stuff they don't like, it's not just limited to girls, it's everyone of all ages and genders, there's examples of it in every direction. You've probably grown up with your mum complaining they look fat or they don't like their hair etc, it's everywhere you look if you pay attention to it you'll notice it far more.

I no longer despise my own body, instead I have parts that I don't like, I've noticed recently that I have suddenly gained stretch-marks on my inner thighs, obviously the first time I noticed these I felt terrible, embarrassed and ashamed if I'm completely honest. I had decided I wasn't going to get my legs out this summer just in case someone noticed, but then I realised that was silly, because I'd melt...

I used to be extremely insecure about my height (I know this sounds like a strange thing to be insecure about but bare with me here) I'm 4ft11, I am smaller than average and most people I know and meet tower above my petite frame.. I was often teased about my height by people I knew or strangers at the bar, up until recently I would want to go straight home in embarrassment. I can remember I'd always tell myself I still had time to grow. (of course that never happened!) Now at age 23 I am no longer embarrassed by my height, because it makes me, me. Being petite also meant I wasn't blessed with big boobs, DAMN IT! (I now understand this is a big insecurity for a lot of girls)

With boobs I feel the expectations are so high, but what is the perfect pair of boobs? Girls with smaller boobs seem to want larger boobs, yet girls with a bigger boobs seem to want smaller boobs. I've had many conversations with girls about the "perfect boobs" and surprisingly everyone's view is varied. Before now, I would long for the day I'd be able to afford a boob job, I was certain that's what I'd need in order to feel confident and to be able to love my body. It seems like almost everyone within the social media, influencer and fitness person has a boob job, it's even become something us girls can openly discuss.

It's no longer a massive deal if you pay to have your idea of "the perfect boobs" although not everyone will agree, I personally feel this is such a positive thing. I am now much happier with my boobs, I would never say I would never have a boob job or state that I no longer need one because I know some day in the future that opinion may change and potentially I could have myself a pair of "perfect boobs". I'm not embarrassed to admit the fact that I'd still never rule out a boob job, because it's the truth, some days I want one and others I don't; right now it definitely isn't my priority but if it happens, it happens.

The "perfect" physique

How many of you long for abs? Long for a big booty? A tiny waist? With the fitness industry booming the way it is right now, it seems everywhere you turn on social media you're bombarded with photos of guys and girls with the "perfect" physique. It seems we all picture the same image in our heads the second anyone even says the word physique, girl or boy it's something very specific. This is perfectly acceptable, I understand that this may be your goal and something you're working towards, however it can out those of us who don't fit into this category in a very insecure place, because we see so little "dad bods" or "curvaceous woman". I'm here to tell you, no matter what shape, size, height, gender you may be, it's enough so long as you love yourself.

You don't have to be like everyone else in order to feel confident, but if abs are your goal then hell yeah work your butt off to achieve it or if you are curvaceous then you post as many pictures as you want that capture those curves and own it! There are things about our bodies that we can and can't change, things in our own control and things that aren't, if you're unhappy about something, you have two choices; learn to love it if it's out of your control or change it if you can. Body confidence shouldn't be about the people looking your way, it should be about the way you feel inside yourself.

It makes me so sad to see boys and girls of such young ages just simply trying to become like everyone else, doing everything they can to fit in, be in the best shape possible and some even go as far as injecting steroids into their systems before even getting to know what results they can gain naturally. Why are children no longer playing on parks, climbing trees? instead their playing with contour kits, steroids and trying to look as old as they possibly can, there seems to be so much pressure on the younger generations now a days and to be totally honest it isn't healthy.

Instead of battling to be like others in order to feel confident, focus on you, work on loving yourself and realise that just because you hate your thighs or boobs or anything else for that matter, doesn't directly mean everyone else also hates them too. Of course no matter who you are you're going to have times when you feel confident, like your outfit is slaying, make up is perfect, but you'll also have times when you feel insecure, your bloated and your skin isn't so good that day but what you need to realise is; THAT'S TOTALLY NORMAL AND WE ALL EXPERIENCE THIS.

Build each others confidence

Build others up, empower them, compliment people often and be as kind as you possibly can, because making others feel good about themselves is important, for all you know that girl you've told is pretty may deep down think she isn't.
IT BUILDS ANOTHER PERSONS CONFIDENCE, WHY WOULD YOU NOT WANT TO DO THAT?

Think before you click on someone's profile just to troll them or say something nasty, karma is real guys and that's something I don't think people realise. Being mean will never get you anywhere, but being kind can bring you everything, words aren't always easily forgotten, so if you have nothing nice to say to people simply keep your mouth shut.

Whoever you are, whatever you do, where ever you may be, choose to love yourself, choose confidence and own that shit. Don't airbrush your acne, your stretch marks or your cellulite, own it through pride and confidence that these things are natural, not everyone can have the bodies we see in magazines or on Instagram because so many of these have simply been airbrushed. I don't know if you guys saw this, but I'm guessing you did because it was everywhere unless you live under a rock I'm sure you've heard of the Kardashian's and following that I'm sure you saw the photo of Kim's butt that went viral because it showed her cellulite. But because in every photo she has it airbrushed, the world seemed totally shocked, when in actual fact it's very common!

I sincerely hope this post has made you think twice before you pick yourself apart, I hope this post helps you realise we all suffer and I hope from here on out you'll chose to be body confident, love yourself and shine bright. Please always remember to hit the like button in order to show you liked this post, hit the share button if you agree with me and get involved in the comments section, I value your thoughts and feedback. It's safe to say I got pretty fired up while writing this, so I'm hoping my message is strong. Be inspired, do more and never settle, until next time, Amy x